A moment of reflection this Mothers Day
Mothers day is one of those days where you find most people taking the time to appreciate the mother figures in their lives. All social media platforms will be filled with heartwarming messages and pictures as people give tribute to these amazing women in their lives. I find Mother’s day to be somewhat a bittersweet day for me because it reminds me of my mother whom I lost 18 years ago. Yet it is also a time that I celebrate the women whom God has placed in my life to stand in the gap and be mothers to me. This mother’s day I came across the image below and it just made me remember the wonderful memories shared with the woman who gave birth to me.
Today whilst I celebrate the mothers I have in my life today and every other woman out there I will also take time to pay tribute to my late mother. Disclaimer – I write this not with sorrow but rather from a position of gratitude to God for His faithfulness in my life to date. So here it goes …
“As I reflect today I realized that I have lived more years without my mother than the years we had together. There is so much that has happened over the last 18 years that I wish she could have lived to see. Right from becoming a teenager and getting my first period (yes its a special milestone in every girl’s life), to graduating from University. I studied so hard and excelled in my studies as she always used to encourage me to do.
Now I can only imagine how much she would have ululated with pride seeing me walking onto that stage to get capped by the president himself. I can only imagine the excitement she would have had when I got my first job after college or that time I went on radio to do the Mazda Radio Show (surely I can almost see her beaming with pride telling people “that’s my daughter on the radio”).
For years now I have been married to an amazing man whom I am confident she would have loved very much. Our wedding was beautiful, we were surrounded by many friends and family who came to their numbers to support and celebrate with us. What a memorable day it was for me. I remember before the wedding I kept telling myself that I would not cry on the day. Yet that moment when I saw my grandfather coming to say congratulations to us, his face beaming with pride that silently said “if your mother were here I know she would have been so proud” , I could not hold back the tears. It was a bittersweet moment for me.
Today I am a mother myself to two beautiful children that would have loved her and called her Gogo had she been here. I can only imagine all the ways she would have spoiled them with so much love and care. The little sister she left me is now a grown woman who is happy with a family of her own.
Life has dealt me with its fair share of challenges which at times have been an unfortunate reminder of her absence in my life. However, I chose not to dwell on the challenges because while they were hard and at times painful I overcame them all. I can only say it was the hand of God upon my life and His unfailing love for me that made me a victor and not a victim.
God has been faithful and true to His word. I have seen Him at work in my life repeatedly. He has opened doors for me, lifted me when I stumbled and fell, He fought battles for me and comforted me every single time I needed it. When I look back I can only say Jehovah Ebenezer, for God has brought me thus far.
Most importantly He did not leave me motherless but He gave me amazing women in my life to call mothers, who have loved, encouraged and stood with to date. For that and more I am forever grateful to God!!!. “
So today whilst a part of my heart will always be reserved for the woman who gave birth to me, there is a part reserved for the women God has given me to stand in her place, to love, support, encourage and be grandmothers to my children. I celebrate them today and I am forever grateful to them.
I am grateful for every time they call to check how I am doing, for every time they have put food on the table for me to eat and for every time they have celebrated my successes with me. I appreciate them for teaching me how to be a good mother to my children, indeed I have learned a lot and continue to learn from them. They are examples I can look up to and emulate. May the good Lord bless them and satisfy them with long lives full of love, joy, and happiness.
Now to every mother out there, I wish you a wonderful mother’s day, you are special in many ways and deserve to be celebrated not just today but every other day. Being a mother is not just about giving birth there are so many other ways that women are performing motherly duties daily. It could be you are that sister who is taking care of younger siblings or your late sister or brother’s children. You could be the aunt who is taking care of other relatives or a mother figure by your calling e.g. a pastor.
All of these roles make you a mother to someone in one way or another. Always remember that you are unique and special in every way. God has given you the strength and capacity to be a mother to encourage, motivate, to be kind and to be patient. There is nothing ordinary about you or what you do. True motherhood is about sacrifice and putting other people’s needs before your own.
To those blessed with the fruit of the womb, carrying a pregnancy for 9 months is not a joke, from the morning sickness to labor and many sleeplessness nights that follow after. It all hard work. The post-partum period comes with the pains of recovering from delivery, breastfeeding pains and aches, nonstop bleeding for days, the baby belly that for many may never really fad away and for some post-partum depression.
I know many people including myself who have cried at some point along the journey of being a mother because the going got tough but every time we picked ourselves up and soldiered on. Whilst being a mother is not easy it comes with so many rewards. Right from the toothless smiles, to the never-ending hugs and the celebrations of milestones like graduations, and marriage its worth every moment.
Being a mother biological or not is a blessing with many rewards. I have so much to say but for now, I will pen off here. I wish every woman out there a Happy Mother’s Day. I celebrate you all and I pray that all your children will rise and call you blessed as the word of God says.
God bless you!
